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Help and advice - I know they are not psychic issues but they are helpful
21-06-2011, 12:43 AM
Post: #1
Help and advice - I know they are not psychic issues but they are helpful
HOW TO KEEP A MAN INTERESTED - this has helped me not pressing the send button on my mobile many a time = hope it helps someone else too


You ever start dating a guy and immediately, you’re walking on eggshells?

It’s not that he’s a bad guy or that he’s being inconsistent with you.

It’s just that, for the first time in a long time, you’re EXCITED about a man.

And because this feeling occurs so infrequently, it’s really got you in a tailspin.

Even though you like your new guy as much as anyone in recent memory, even though things have been nothing short of perfect for these first two weeks, you feel a pit of dread in your stomach.

“What’s going to go wrong here?”
“When is the other shoe going to drop?”
“I hope he’s serious about a long-term relationship.”

And, most of all:

“I don’t want to waste my time on the wrong man ever again.”

Hey, I don’t blame you for a second for feeling all of those things. No woman over the age of 20 should assume that every man is solid, stable, and relationship-oriented. Naturally, you want to minimize your chances of getting hurt.

But what is the RESULT of this fearful, walking-on-eggshells mindset?

You start to obsess when he doesn’t call.

You ask your friends what it “means” when he says, “I’ll see you later.”
You tense up. You lose sleep. You become uptight.

You want to be loved SO badly, but you’re SO afraid of getting hurt that you’ve turned yourself into a shell of your best self.

Don’t believe me?

Are you more attractive when you’re confident and loose or insecure and uptight?

Are you more attractive when you assume your man adores you or when you live in fear that he might bail like all the rest?

Are you more attractive when you’re focused on enjoying the present or obsessing about what might happen in the future?

I think the answer’s obvious.

Living in the present is the most effective way to make a man fall in love with you.
If we want to call you, we’ll call you.

If we want to introduce you to our family, we’ll introduce you to our family.

If we want to take down our profiles and commit, we’ll do it.

Which is why, when you want to know what you should do about the guy who makes you weak in the knees, the answer couldn’t be more simple: NOTHING!!!

“Doing something” means you’re trying to keep your emotional tether alive, to nudge him into calling you, seeing you, committing to you.
But the great thing about men is this: We don’t need to be nudged!

So when it’s been 10 hours and you haven’t gotten a reply to his text, you let it go.

When it’s Thursday night and he hasn’t called to see you on Saturday, you let it go.

It’s three weeks into dating and his profile’s up, you let it go.

Why? Wouldn’t it make more sense to call him, text him, and see him so he doesn’t lose interest in you?

Nope.

"Nudging" a man to take action only lets him know that he’s in control, you’re desperate and needy, and that you don’t trust that he knows what’s good for him.

The truth is, if you’re the right woman for him, you don’t NEED to nudge him.

Remember what it’s like when a guy’s excited about you?

He calls, he follows through, he’s thoughtful, he’s chivalrous, he’s gentlemanly, he WANTS a commitment with you.

But sometimes it takes a few weeks for us to figure all of that out for ourselves.

Remember, men like to “buy”. We don’t want to be “sold”.

Anything you do to amp up the pressure for him to make a decision is just going to drive him away – the exact OPPOSITE reaction you want from your man.

But that leaves you with the same burning question: “what should I DO, Evan?”

The answer couldn’t be simpler:

Make your PRESENT so amazing that he WANTS to have a FUTURE with you.

It’s not about finding out in week 1 whether he wants to live in the city or the country, or hoping he says “I love you” by week 4.

Those are things you’ll deal with later.

For now, just have fun.

Laugh. Say yes. Be easygoing. Smile. Fool around. Enjoy the moment.
You never have more leverage over a man than when he’s CHOSEN you on his own accord, when he’s EMOTIONALLY INVESTED in you because he FEELS so happy every time he’s around you.

And if he’s receiving texts that say, “Where are you?!” or late night calls that plead, “Where is this going?”, you’re not making him feel too good in the present.


Since your man CAN’T know after a few weeks whether you’re “the one”, just relax and enjoy the ride. The RIGHT guy steps up to the plate and commits to you in the first couple of months. The WRONG guy never escalates his efforts and keeps you as a once-a-week option indefinitely.

Why?

Because that’s what he WANTS to do.

Thus, it’s really easy to tell the difference between a man who’s serious and a man who’s wasting your time, so you don’t invest more than 8 weeks in a dead-end relationship.

But in order to get ANY relationship off the ground, you HAVE to put off all fears, all nudging, and all thoughts of your future and just ENJOY the present.

The right guy knows what to do next.

HOPE THAT HELPS - I WILL POST MORE WHEN I GET CHANGE
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21-06-2011, 01:14 AM
Post: #2
RE: Help and advice - I know they are not psychic issues but they are helpful
Words To Make Him Open Up To You

Until recently, there was a belief that women spoke twice as many words per day as men do.
I've got to tell you....this isn't true. There has been no research that validates this
claim. It started because some individual made the observation that women value verbal
communication more than men do.

That part is true - women tend to love words, and men just aren't that comfortable with
emotional communication. Because of this fact, it's easy to believe that men just don't want to
talk at all or they can't stand it when a woman talks too much. No doubt you have had a man
tell you such a thing at one time.

Let me tell you a secret. Men may not like to open up about their feelings as much as do
women, but they like it when they feel a woman is actually listening to them.

If you want him to open up to you, here are three magic words you can say that will cause
even the most stoic man to find himself wanting to share himself with you.

"Tell Me More"

Here's how it works:
Susan: "How was your day?"
Stan: "Fine."
Susan (smiling): "Tell me more."
Stan: "I said it was fine, what more is there to tell?"
Susan: "I know you did, but still...tell me more."

At this moment, let me tell you what he's thinking. "Huh, she actually seems interested.
That's odd because I don't think I'd find it that interesting. O.K. if she wants to know then
I'll tell her." And he begins to open up.

Oh it sounds so simple, and yet it works like a charm. He won't make fun of you I promise.
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03-08-2011, 12:23 AM
Post: #3
RE: Help and advice - I know they are not psychic issues but they are helpful
I think again we all need advice and sometimes not always Psychics.


If you are interested in seeking the answer to the question ‘How to win back an ex?’ then it is of utmost importance to know the things that you must not do while trying to get your ex back. This is because of the fact that most of the people who try to get their ex back after a breakup fail eventually. Learning how to win back an ex is a matter of learning the do’s and don’t while trying to win your ex back.

If your ex was really involved with you then there are chances that he or she may tend to you without your putting any effort once the blazing time of breakup is over. And if in the mean time you do something wrong in an attempt get your ex back then you are warned that this can take your ex far away from you. Here are the 10 biggest mistakes that people do while trying to get their ex’s back.

1.How to win back an ex? By being overly nice? No!
If you really want to have a good relationship with your ex then you need not to do something that required plenty of effort on your part. You can force yourself to act overly nice for few weeks, few months or a year but ultimately you have to tend your normal attitude and personality. Do not try something that is transitory. You need to understand your ex and act accordingly. ‘How to win back an ex’ is not a magic that can twist the mind frame of your ex over a night. So, stop thinking that you being overly nice and caring will make you more appealing to your ex. Acting normally, gracefully and confidently is what the most people like in their beloved ones.

2.By persuading your ex to come back? No!
Have not you heard people saying that love is blind? Logic and arguments do not work in love and hate. Every mother loves her son no matter he is a robber or a priest. Similarly, if you think that telling your ex about the positive points of your relationship and making him or her remember the good times you two had together will help in inciting a new wave of love in his or her heart then you are wrong. Emotions do not work that way. You need to understand the fact that you can not answer the question ‘How to win back an ex?’ by saying ‘By asking him/her to love you’.

3.By telling your ex that you love him/her? No!
You got to understand that after a breakup your ex is not in a romantic mood. And repeating again and again the phrase ‘I love you’ is going to do nothing except putting some disgrace to your personality. Begging can not win a life partner for you and even if your ex decides to give you another chance then do not even think that your ex is going to give you the respect once deserves from a life partner. Getting your ex back does not mean getting a bed partner. Love must come with respect.

4.By attracting him/her to your assets? No!
Showing off your wealth and assets may help you in attracting some new individuals to yourself. But do not think that this can make your ex love you again. She might start hating your new Ferrari once she gets that it belongs to you. You can deal with the feelings of your ex by showing off but you can never change the emotions. To change the things inside the heart of your ex, you need to do something more stirring and emotive. Wearing branded dresses and purchasing new bike is not the way how to win back an ex.

5.This is your personal matter and you can handle it alone? No!
Love is something that plays a significant role in the life of every human being. The ups and downs of love have added enthralling experiences to everyone’s life and there is nothing wrong in learning from the experiences of other people to make your life better. Getting help in love matters should be taken as simple as we take getting help in legal matters. Consulting your psychologists or a close friend can help you a lot in making rational decisions in winning back an ex. A good psychologist can make you understand how to win back an ex in a meeting of couple of hours.

6.By trying to contact her? No!
Whenever once goes through a breakup, next morning a strong urge develops to contact your partner and clear up the mess. This thing works very well when we talk about small skirmishes but when it comes to a breakup and your partner once says you “It’s over!” then things change drastically. The new situation demands something different. You must understand that your ex is going through same kind of emotional turbulence as you are going through and it shall need some time to get settled down. Contacting your partner right after the breakup is something that would infuriate the bad memories and make the way of how to win back an ex more difficult.

Most of the people who try to win their ex back fail because they take emotional decisions when all they need is patience and logic. Learning how to win back an ex starts with learning what mistakes you must not commit. This is the time when most people are extremely disturbed mentally and their thinking power gets failed in making rational decisions. Winning your ex back shall require plenty of patience and mindful tactics. The key things is that ‘How to win back an ex?’ makes you learn the ways how to make your ex chasing you rather then chasing him or her yourself.
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03-08-2011, 12:25 AM
Post: #4
RE: Help and advice - I know they are not psychic issues but they are helpful
How to Win Your Ex Back: 5 Most Successful Tips!
Most of the people have intense emotional surge to win their ex back right after the breakup and you are not an exception. If this is happening to you then it is quite normal as millions of other people join you in the quest to learn how to win your ex back. Winning your ex back is not something impossible but the important thing is should you get your ex back or not? Is he or she the right person to take the place of your life partner? Would you be able to spend a happy time with your ex? All these questions need to be answer prior to finding the tips on how to win your ex back.

Relationship psychologist have worked a lot on this common issue and have come up with multiple loopholes in the human psychology through which you can enter their heart and try to change their thoughts. Most of these tips work well for most of the people and have helped thousands of guys in winning their ex back.

In the following part of this script you will find the 5 most successful tips on how to win your ex back. All these tips are time tested and have been spoken highly by the person who applied them in their lives.

1. How to Win Your Ex Back By Bypassing Your Emotions:
No doubt uncontrolled emotions are the things that tempt a person to take wrong steps. Bad emotions are curse that tempt a person so strong to take wrong steps. It is as simple as a diabetic is tempted to take carbohydrates by the view of delicious pastries and in the end he or she finds his or herself in deep trouble just because of a little carelessness in tackling with his or her emotions. What happens right after a breakup? A turbulent flow of emotions full of sadness and feeling of constant dejectedness. If you are able to tackle them tactfully then you are most likely to choose your following steps wisely.

2. Quit Talking to Your Ex:
Give your ex some time to settle down and in the meanwhile try to get rid of annoying emotions that might have surrounded you since the day of breakup. The heat of breakup needs to be faded off before you start thinking about a new journey. So, it is of utmost importance to avoid contacting your ex for a week or two. It will bring two good things to your relationship. First, it will quench the quake of emotional turbulence and second it will make your ex think that he or she is the one who lost a valuable person. So, this shall increase your value in the eyes of your ex.

3. Be The One Your Ex Liked You To Be:
It is not all about saying things. Talking hurts and doing works. This is the rule of broken hearts and tender souls. As previously describes if you want to learn how to win your ex back then make sure that you are not trying to talk to your ex unnecessarily. Whenever you are going to text him/her or going to call your ex, ask yourself “Do I have a rational reason to talk to my ex?”

It is the practical things that do matter. Try to be the one your ex once idealized. Bring out all the good things in you that your ex liked and make your every word and every act decorated as directed by the likeness or dis-likeness of your ex. Your being good is better acknowledged than your saying that you are good.

4. Use Your Past To Your Advantage:
Where there are a lot of difficult things involved in attracting your ex than attracting a new person there are few positive points as well. Do not forget that you were once the most intimate person in the life of your ex. This makes you the best person that is supposed to know the psychology of your ex. You will know the favorite dishes, favorite perfumes, favorite places, and favorite dresses of your ex. You can exploit this fact to your advantage and bring all these favorites of your ex to your life. This might not make you a very adorable person for all other people around you but one thing is sure that this will catch the eyes of your ex.

It is important to stay decent all the time and do not let it look obvious that you are doing all this just to attract your ex. For example you should not wear the shirt that once your ex said that it looks the best on you. Rather your wearing a shirt similar to that will make you look decent and graceful and would serve the above stated purpose at the same time

5. Act Friendly And Use Enchanting Memories:
Even if you two have decided to have a breakup there is nothing wrong in being friends. This is something that has a strong logic behind it and your ex can not deny it. Once you are friends it will make sure that you two are still in contact then there are strong possibilities that the nature of relationship might get changed. You can make your ex remind the beautiful memories of the time you two spent together. You two can talk about the places you visited and the fun you had. There is no wonder if your ex asks you out for a dinner the next day.



Winning back an ex is a desire of each of broken heart. Many a time people fail to follow the right path to get their ex back and have to face another breakup after the first. Time can go very harsh sometimes so it is strongly recommended to use only time tested and hundred percent working suggestions in this regards. The above mentioned five tips on how to win your ex back have brought happiness in the lives of thousands of people.
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03-08-2011, 09:06 AM
Post: #5
RE: Help and advice - I know they are not psychic issues but they are helpful
I think it is best not to be prescriptive..as we have all probably found..you ring a psychic and say someone is acting odd..and you gain insight into why!! most of it has to be setting ones own boundaries..with a drop of men are from mars..then throw the self help books away..as they can tangle you in knots ! I have watched several happy marriages, now with children come out of not following what should be done..if they had paid heed to advice they would probably not be where they are today..happy..
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03-08-2011, 09:50 AM
Post: #6
RE: Help and advice - I know they are not psychic issues but they are helpful
We do need to remember nothing is black and white ..I think if we thought that none of us here would go to psychics and ask "why?" !!!!!!

the mars and venus, just one copy !! is useful as it can simply highlight how differently we think. Just as an example..one of my friends boyfriend's broke up with her..she told him not to break up with her as she had never been so in love..5 yrs later they finally married and have 3 children..love isn't logical..that's the beauty and the difficulty of it!!! so I've learnt there is to take care of yourself, your needs, your self respect.. mix it up a bit don't be predictable...and darts of risk..and following your heart..and somewhere in between..is where love may flourish..
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